What’s Going on: In My Head

Listen up boys and girls, for I have a story to tell. It’s about a magical place inside my head, known as Pyschopathia. In Psychoparia, the sun is always shining, and the tide is always right. In this town is a community of strange little people. Steve Stephan Stevenson is a talkative French terrorist. Steves favorite hobbies include world domination, and making fun of Americans. Larry is a shy, and quiet russian arsonist. Larry is the man who tells me to burn things! Its a good thing that Jim is there to talk me out of it. Jim is a smooth talking lawyer who has never lost a case, but then again he lives in a very small town. And then that brings us to Sara, who generally likes to watch TV all of the time. Thanks to all of the doritos shes been munching on, she developed a small muffin top, but nobody in Psychopathia minds. I will comtinue this tall tale after THESE MESSAGES!

A Message to Idiots

I am so sick of you idiots who put comments on posts that are like “1st!” or “2nd!”. I dont understand what you are trying to prove! “I have no life so I think I am going to wait on this computer untill someone makes a post, then comment about nothing in particular just to prove to other people that I am a big enough geek to wait by my computer and preform the previously stated transsaction.” I mean really folks! Why do you do that??

You Might Be a Prep If…

• You’re looking forward to a sweet 16 party
• You’re reading this wile eating a stake dinner
• If your favorite TV show involves the Disney Channel
• If your favorite show involves a drama of some sorts
• If your favorite food is lobster
• If you got mad at your mom for never getting you a third pony
• If you got mad at dad for getting a white Escalade
• If your house has more than two stories, and stucco siding
• If you were dissapointed that you recieved a PS3 Instead of an Xbox 360, only to later realize that you did recieve an Xbox 360, just not the model you wanted.
• If the flamingoes on your lawn are real
• If the flamingoes on your lawn are porcelien
• If your lawnmower is a flock of illegal aliens, have of which you named Paco, the other half of which you haven’t ever had to talk to
• You have a butler
• You know anyone named Jeeves
• You own a black or red blaser
• You actually own silver spoons
• Your poker is for company stock
• To you, trading cards is just a fancy way of saying “stocks and bonds”
• You never got to buy out chuckie cheeses
• Your clothes weren’t made in a chinese sweatshop

Making Fun of Emos!

Recently, Dragonninja has decided to become emo. Somewhat lame jokes about emos. Some are funny and some are stupid! Let’s get started:

Normally, when a kidnapper sends you a ransom note, they threaten to kill the person kidnapped, but emos threaten to kill themselves.

When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. But, when life gives emos lemons, they cut the lemons in half and shove the lemons in their eyes and watch their corneas burn and shrivel.

If emos say that they are sick of the world, life and everything, then why do they become emo. Ergo, they would draw attention to themselves, and make it seem like they care what other people think about them.

Can emos read? Can emos watch TV? Do they know about anything that happens in teh world outside of their lives. Its almost selfish, the way they hate themselves.

Emos walk alone, claiming they have no friends. It seems odd that their are so many people like that that we had to make it a social class. There were 11 other people dressed exactly like they were in the school yearbook, and they were complaining that they had no friends.

They are being conformists to the near majority of non conformists.

And the grand finale folks! If emos hate the world so much, then why do they take the time out of their busy scheduals to buy all of the clothes, and get the hair styles, and dye their hair, and get the bracelets, and get the piercings, and put the face paint on, and try as hard as possible to be hated by everyone. You just don’t have that kind of time in this modern 21st century world!!! You have to be desperate to draw attention to do that much.

Stupid Commando

Stupid Commando. For all of the cool people reading the cool blog [this one, in case you didn't catch that] I have several announcements:

Momcorp Decides to make a blog: Momcorp blog opened up by Tommer651. I will not provide the link in order to help my own buisness. You can as him for it if you want.

The 90’s: Recently I have discovered a new, and exciting kind of music. I now have hundreds of 90’s alternative songs logged on my computer! I really like the sound of Sum41.

Stupid Commando: Commando has no new posts because his life is being wasted playing halo. A good song to express commando is called “Wasted Years” by Iron Maiden

Willy Wonka buys Warbucks: Wiliam himself would turn over in his grave if he knew about the messed up corporal things that his factory is doing. It used to be about the fun, the magic, but now its nothing but a corperate sham. Why William? Why did you leave us here with these idiots!?

News Today

Today in the world, something happened! There was a person that did something, and then was repremanded for said thing. There were also places that had stuff in them.

Seriously folks, there isn’t anything going on. I absolutely hate winter. Absolutely. So, I hope you guys don’t decide to join Momcorp or something.

Oh my God. I just remember something that happened in the news: Rapidy gave us our biggest sale in the history of the planet. Rapidy decided to buy 2.5 trillion dollars worth of bagels. Thanks Rapidy, and thanks for obviously having a drug cartel!

Bagel Update

What are you blind? Didn’t you read the title of this post? Go to that friggan bagel page and go check it out! You moron! Why are you still reading. I am just going to keep on typing untill you stop reading. Glargle. Gorfmanst. Dringlifingle. Will you quit reading and go to the bagels page already!!!!!

WacArnolds

The famous employer, WacArnolds, provider of jobs to those on wellfare, has announced today that it will be splitting its stock. For all of you who have invested in WacArnolds, Congrats! You now have double the stock that you once had! For those of you who hadn’t invested, Congradulations! You aren’t idiots! As you should already know this isa joke site. WacArnolds was in a sketch on the Chappelle Show. Seriously though, that is the not-so-serious news.

Virtucon Purchases Cable Company in LA

You heard it here and you heard it first. You sure as heck better not hear it wrong though! Virtucon has purchased its own Cable Company in Las Angeles. Dr. Evil is happy to make the deal, and Number 2 has been ever so delighted as well. So remember, if you want REAL fake news, then you have come to the right place. RPF Inc. All you buisness humour, without any truth whatsoever!

Let’s Get Lost!

Lost is back, and its on tonight! As everyone knows, Oceanic Airlines was one of the top scoring buisnesses of the year. For the longest time it was speculated that an engine malfunction brought the passengers of Oceanic Flight 186 to the island, however, Oceanic Ailines says it was fate. Oceanic Airlines will also be allowing passengers to get lost, for they will now deliberately crash half of the planes that they fly. Lets hope you hit the island!

-Mr. O